lots of stuffs to talk about, yeah tuesday went back to school to re-apply higher NITEC. hmm... then tour round the school with my gang. actually suppose to watch movie then in the end can't get to watch as all the timings are not suitable for us. so we went to pasa malam and walk then we went home..
talked about yesterday me and that jerk having a tiff, he complained saying that he felt unsafe between us, oh my goodness!please think carefully, all this while I tolerate you, I never complained only you complain what is this? this is unfair to me, then I read his blog he say he scared of getting hurt and will be shattered if he love me to deep.. yaya, since the day we patch, he doesn't seems to acknowledge this r/s and even me. treat me as transparent, my wound is much more deeper than yours you still have the cheek to say that you are afarid of getting hurt, my previous r/s really scarred me though the wound is already heal but sometimes the trauma is still around. haiz, you say will treat me better. stop saying that sentence, i've heard enough of your pack of lies, you big fat liar,whateveR I do, i'm just a someone helping you the someone is not important to you instead I become yr maid, servant doing or helping you with your stuffs, frankly speaking at times i'm quiet is beacuse i dislike talking to you, don't ever treat me as a doormat or a spare tyre, thinking back about stuffs between us, I really hate myself for being stupid to fall for you, fall for someone who doesn't seems to cherish the chances given to him.
ask yourself, are you fit to be my boyfriend or any girls' boyfriend? I bet those girls will detest you to the core,what kind of attitude you have? only know how to complain, malign people, having a weird attitude no wonder you have so little friends. You are old enough to know what to do and to decide for whatever stuffs, no need me to tell you, why must heaven be so unfair to me, let me get hurt once, now giving me problems and having such a useless boyfriend, why can't I have a mature, much older guys, those who are understanding ones to be my boyfriend.
How I wish you have half of my guys' friend personality and character. If I could, I rather swop with someone else for a better guy. Scared of getting hurt? then might as well, don't go into a r/s get a pet lah,though I have no confidence in r/s but I pulled through and leave my past behind, asked me to be your girlfriend is you, asked for a reconcilation is also from you, what else do you want? is very torturing to face someone who doesn't bother about you how you feel? can you please put yourself in my shoes? you ever called me a self-fish I think you are the one who is being self-fish
I should have listen to Ling, she ever said if he doesn't care about me then there is no point and I should forget about him, I don't want to break up so fast is because of this stupid stuffs then initiate the break up . Talked to Joel bout these then joel said maybe his feelings fade already or he's trying to think of ways to leave me fine!Joel so lame say is beacuse I wore braces then that jerk don't want me. nonsense lah! I don't need you to walk on me, I can walk out anytime, haiz talked to joel bout this then I cried, today chatted with Nick bout this stuff then Nick say he feel unsafe is because I too pretty, then have scores of admirers , that's not true I this year till now no one ever want to woo me,haiz... I this kind of pattern who want? even I go do plastic surgery or what still no one will want.
Nevermind, there are plenty of better guys out there. If I ever end this r/s I just wanna give myself a long break by staying single and unavailable, but getting into a r/s also gives you an experience and helps one self to grow
torn
!I WANT
More Money change my hair colour
Have a height of AT LEAST 165 and above
Keep my hair much longer like last time
GO korea/taiwan/europe/USA
Maybe get new MP3 player .Wang zi bian qing wa Idol drama VCD
Get TKD black belt New shoes
get much darker
have a good future Adidas Windbreaker Get a job
BUy another month supply of coloured contact lense
A hanbok(korean costume)& yukata(kimono)
buy flower power new tops have a wonderful 18th birthday
get into poly
